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Part 2! You are just his friend so mind your own business!

I guess you are all dying to know what happened after. As I told you earlier I wanted this "Mr a man must not allow his wife to be what God has created her to be". to learn a good lesson.I know he wanted his documents signed so I told my hubby,it would be signed but he would have to cost him.
My hubby was very curious to know my plans. I went to the man at this office,who happens to be related to my mum, I told him my experiences with my hubby,s friend and made him promise to sign the documents. I told my hubby to tell him to take is documents there,when he got there he asked to see the MD, they told him to sit, he sat for over an hour,my relative called me on phone,I told him I will be there in an hour.Mind you that was the last day to have the documents signed. I arrived ,exchanged plesantries with the secretary when I heard someone say madame good afternoon.Good day sir,I replied!,How is madame and the kids? I left briskly to the MD,office.
After 30 minutes, I was about the leave, as soon as I closed the door behind me,He rose to his feet ,he looked tired and worried.He said madame I have been waiting to see the MD for such long hours, I replied, why didnt you tell me,let me go back inside and talk to him for you. I went inside,after 5 minutes I was out and he was called in.
My relative the MD started by saying "oh you must really be a very nice person,she has told me about you,how nice you have been to her and how much you love women to succeed.I love to meet men like that,they are worthy of honour and respect" He signed the documents for him, believe you me.I am sure he died  to all his chauvinistic tendencies that day! He broke out in sweat and with shaky hands, he said thank you. He did not say much,he was too ashamed to say anything.His thoughts must have been "this is a woman I have always tried to bring down with my ultterances,yet she helped in the most profound way".As he was about to close the door the MD put the final nail to the coffin he said" By the way my wife is the CEO of xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx bank, incase you need a loan to facilitate your project, just keep me posted,she might be able to help". I could not see the look on his face,but his body language showed that he was enveloped in remorse.
5 minutes after he left, I thanked my relative and left. I was proud of myself. proud of the wisdom I employed.
I didnt see our "friend" for months, We decided to visit his family and I immediately noticed a different atmosphere.He started by saying how more women are needed in nation building,how wives should be allowed to follow their dreams etc.
His wife told me we should leave the boys alone and go upstairs to talk about the latest fashion.It was just a ploy for us to be alone.She told me,how are husband changed after he got his documents and wanted to know what I did.I told her that was my secret.As we drove out from their home, I felt like a winner,not just for myself but for every woman, that has been looked down upon, just for what sex God created them to be, just for what they have in between their legs!God loves women, and He created  us to be unique!Shalom!


signed.She said I helped him,I said yes.She was curious to know what I did,but  their, jbecaushabetw

You are just his friend, so mind your own business!

Yesterday was my birthday so I decided not to blog.Nothing much,cleaned, cooked and basked in the messages coming from every where.Now I want to bring you another scenerio,the scenerio of the obnoxious friend, i.e hubby,s friend. We ladies dont really have that problem
 because if We have friends  getting on Our nerves,We quickly bring them to order or as most ladies do discard them.Believe me I dont fall into the category of the discarders{ I know there is no word like that but it just sounds rights!}Now back to my point, I know for married Sisters,there has always been this friend of your hubby that just does not like you,cant stand your guts,hates your passion and probably jealous of your beauty!OOPS! I said it,no I didnt say his wife wasnt good looking, You said it!
Anyway there is this friend of his,who would always complain indirectly of how much of the liberty my hubby has given me. He will always find a way to fuse a topic on how a man should be in control at all times in any discussion, when I am around.
Whenever we visit their lovely home and his wife would say things like, "oh! I heard you just came back from so so and so business trip,I wish I could have the strength to do so".I always smile,because the next thing Mr Chauvinist would say it "Sweetheart,thank God you dont have the strength for such things,you are so good around the house".
I know this woman was dying inside,lovely home yes! Something was missing,she had no freedom.She would come to me in private and say,"I admire You, You are much more younger than I am ,but I respect You".
I knew My husband saw all these, but he hardly contributes to the discussions,the only thing he says over and over is"My mama is very unique,you cant find any other woman like her,and after every visit to their home,He would say "Mama you are the best woman,I could not has wished for anyone better". I love you and I am proud of you!
I made up my mind to get back at this man,but how? My opportunity came!
He needed to get some papers signed at an office,he needed the contacts badly,guess who knew the man in charge? Me! I could have just called or sent him with a note ,no I didnt! I wanted him to pay,I wanted him off my back  for good.
You are a vicar! Are you not suppose to be forgiving? Yes you are right! Yet the bible says in 1Cor 1:19" I will destroy the wisdom of the wise; the intelligence of the intelligent I will frustrate". I wanted this man off my back for good,I wanted him off my case.I wanted him to respect women. I needed to teach him a good lesson.[CONCLUDING PART LATER,DID YOU EXPECT ME TO GIVE YOU ALL THE JUICY STORY IN ONE GO?}

Dont fix me just fix my marriage!

I have promised you babes to be as honest and as blunt as I can. I am asking the Holy spirit to help me as I share my experiences with you.Our marriage,our homes is not like a menu in a kid,s party.Take a moment and picture foods served to children at a birthday party,most of the time,its simple,colorful and sweet. The peppers are almost never added.
Is that not the kind of marriage we all want? The sweet,rock me,hug me,kiss me,carry me like a princess marriage. Are you still day dreaming!Snap out of it!
May our homes be fruitful and sweet in Christ name,but darlings dont based your marriage on the pages of the mills and boom novels.{ Some of us read that in secondary school,didnt we?}
We wives want our marriages fixed most of the time,but not ourselves.
Now let me give you a perfect scenerio. Naturally I was born heady, I will not give up on a probelm until I find the solution.Some attribute it to the Ekitish[ a group of people living in the south-west of Nigeria] blood flowing in me. Most of the time I never rest until all is well.Can any lady identify with that? All is well if my been heady is only towards probelms and not towards my hubby!
I am making sense now,am I not? I can hear some ladies saying, oh my God thats me! You are right,because that,s me too some years ago and once in a while,when I ignore the voice of reasoning.
You want your way, You might not be brute or rude about it,but You  want things to go your way all the time.Selfish! Afterall I am the weaker sex in this marriage.Why is the marriage not going the way I want? I pray,I fast you might ask.I am a child of God,I speak in tongues,I follow all I am been told.God fix my marriage! Take a glass of water and make sure you are sitted,cos what I want to tell you might make you dizzy!You are the intruder in your home, the one that has refuse to kill the little foxes! The one with the spirit of division.Change,you cant have it your way,let a sub-way sandwich.You can only have it God,s way.The man is the head,thats the way the Lord wants it.You can pray that he sees things your way but you cant force! If I am not still getting to you,just answer this question as I leave to have my breakfast"Who has the honey-stick,you or hubby? " Later babes,b

Decisions! Who makes it, hubby or you ?

I hope my husband never reads this blog. When it comes to decision making, lets be honest women always want to have a say.One thing I have learnt is that Men are the head,to respected and cherished. Darlings! dont you think that they dont see issues the way they should? Now lets take a look at practical issues. Earlier on in our marriage,I was the flambouyant one,I wanted every jewery my account could pay for,I was addicted to gold and diamond.My hubby the Priest had spent 16 years of his adult life in a catholic seminary, you get the gist? There were issues of  the way I keep spending,mind you I was making my own cool cash.Hubby never asked me what I did with it, infact he was generous to a fault.I guess I will call those years the honeymoon years.Then one day,he looked at me straight in the eye and said " just because i allow you to spend your money the way you do does not mean it belongs to you" I got the message,I did not need a soothsayer to decode it for me.Babe! you got to stop and think,plan and wake up! You are not a hollywood star¬! More gist coming,but right now I want to eat tuwo and ogbono soup!

Mr temper comes out

Act 2 scene 1- My husband as a temper scenerio. To be honest with you my husband doesnt talk to much,but when he is under a tremendious stress, Mr temper comes out.  He has never beaten or hit me in our 15 years together that I thank God for! I know most pastors or ministers dont agree on the next point I am about to stress.If your hubby beats you,kindly separate.You dont want to be maimed,disfigured or even killed.Your kids would hate you even in the grave. I am not saying divorce,I am saying look another abode that would make you and your children feel safe. Dont subject those little ones to that can of horror.Move as soon as possible,then you can pray.Dont remain there,I have said it on countless occassions that I dont want to attend a burial of a sister that I know has been abused now dead,knowing that i told her to remain in the abusive marriage.I cant live with myself. So the temper am talking about is not full with rage.Let me give you an example . Baby,you know those items will cost 100 Mn, hubby- 100 what! Where do you expect me to get that kind of money!When I was still young in this institution I would get angry or sulk.No way!He gets away with it all the time,so the Holy spirit taught me this.Okay baby i reply, didnt mean to upset you,I  thought agreed on it,but if you cant afford it,just bring the amount you have,I will work with it.{Remember that he agreed giving you 200 Mn 2weeks prior to that,maybe he thinks you have forgotten,maybe he, just changed his mind or simply covering up,to admit he does not have the cash} Whatever it is you want your home,you want it to work!You love him.You are a child of God. so simply collect the 50 Mn from him,thank him,hug or kiss him.Dont say any other thing on that issue.offer him his meal, change the topic and dont frown. Believe me,this isnt black mail,its worked for me every time.Within the next few days hubby will call you and say Lape you know what? I have this 70 Mn for you to add to the money I gave you days ago.Now you have 120 Mn instead of 50 Mn,it might not be the 200 Mn you were hoping for,but you got more than you expected.You have your sanity,your home is safe and believe me,that night he will make love to love like his life depends on it.That is his way of saying, I love you,thanks for being the strong one,and am your baby! If he does not give you more money within the first 1 week,believe him, he genuinely doesnt have the money,and most times their man- ego cant admit it or he simply loves you too much,to allow you worry over his finances.Whatever it is!talk to God to help him deal with his temper,love him,apologise when you are right,not with a mockery stint or fake smile.Let him know you mean every word,even when he knows he is wrong. This gets to men.My hubby quickly starts looking for  a way to make it up to me. Babes, I want peace in my home, what about you? Try this and I trust and pray it would work.Enjoy!Till i bring you more scenerios!

Sweet marriage!What we are never told in church.

BABES! MARRIAGE ISSUES! AM SMILING YET AM DYING! I have this few tips for my sisters that I have gathered along,used and taught others in this 15 years of mine in this university called marriage.You are expected not to resit in this university but i tell you that failures are not just every semester but it might be on every test and exams you take in this union. As a female minister these tips has helped my friends,sisters and even older women.Please lets go on this journey as I share my few secrets with you.The most important foundation that u need is Christ any other foundation is the lagos lagoon! So if you are reading this piece and you are not yet born/again, take a moment and accept Christ into your heart.Drop holy candle,baba in ijebu,mama sutana in ilaje and simply ask for help from the Holy spirit. Now thats settled! Lets move on to the issue of the day. I will be showing scenerios,tips and lessons. Act 1 scene 1- My hubby isnt born-again.Dont nag,cry,beg,rave or go auto pilot.Pray always not with him sitting in front of you and you asking the Holy spirit to change him, or praying in the next room with shouts of how God should come into his heart.No,no,no! Simply try these.Baby am off to church,food is in the fridge,microwave etc.Is there anything you would want me to do for you before I go? Am taking the kids so that you can have more time to do your work,finish your writings or watch your favorite sport.*cue to you saying,i love you so much,but Christ loves you more.Always do this with a smile and with real affection.Honey am back!Service today was wonderful.Make sure you always tell him the part that helps you become a better person,not the one that talks about unbelievn husbands.Pst X really spoke to us wives today,honey I just pray that the Lord helps me to be a better person.Lesson- He will begin to beat himself up in the inside,he cant take it anymore,why is she so nice? Who is this Jesus? What do they really do to them in that church? He will begin to ask himself this questions.Wala! one sunday morning,Wunmi, I will go with you to church today,I have a question I want to ask Pst X. You should simply answer,yes love you are welcome.

ANGRY BUT PLEASED ,AND SO WHAT PART 2

Yesterday I wrote about some of the men on our church committee,today i will like to complete the list.

Mr Evergood- At first, He strikes you as really polite, honest and very dedicated.Dont get me wrong He is, honest in the monetary sense of it.An austute politician, not that he is seeking a political office in the local town assembly but he,s area speciality lies in the politics of "turn them into foes as I raise".
At first as the vicar I always divulge senstive info to him,but now I have learnt my lesson,once bitten twice shy.

Mr Fivestar- The head of the diocese Synod- His name, I believe he chose from heaven.Suits him perfectly, a rogue, greedy,a glutton in every sense of it and His taste for the good things of life as earned him the nickname of "Jesus would love this"
 His Maradonic attributes are so good,that he wingled his way into the heart of the primate.Monies that mysteriously disaapperd over the 15 years that he has led.
Projects never were excecuted but receipts has always been provided.
I almost fainted that i visited his new home in Balmoral,He had invited me about the charity work we were doing in Luvin.
He lived in this palatial home,sensing my dissaproval ,he quickly added that the house was built from the money he inherited from his uncle-in-law.the Duke of Neverland.
He hates me with a passion,and the only reason ,he had not wriiten a petition to the Archdoicese about me,what the fact that I had proved that the last 100 thousand pounds sent for work in our diocese ,was used to finance his excessive reckless lifestyle.
What can a poor vicar like me do?I have to live and eat with dishonest people,afterall we are all human,of course I just told lies to the wife of a local,telling her that the tight obscure dress she had on,would make her husband stay home,knowing fully well that age and beauty was no longer on the 72 yr old lady married to a man 20 years her junior.

Will not give you more information our Mr Fivestar, but would rather move to our next man.

Mr Headstart-Very good man,honest but a sissy.He is suppose to be the chairman of the committee,but I have sat and watch him, being shouted at.He,s been told over and over to shout up,and even been threatened to be thrown out of the meetings at various times.
My human take on him ,is he is weak and that he has the heart of a woman.Believe me a very humble and submissive woman.
He chairs the committee as a figure head and when ever he adopts a motion as a chairman,He would be walked out of the venue weeping.
So Mr headstart,has decided to keep quiet at meetings, never presides and oks every decision even if its has to do with wiping out the whole village.

Mr Agility- Street wise,illiterate in the sense of grammar,literate in the sense of money making.Mr Fivestar,s inlaw and comrade in arms.Dont really know much about him though.The popular opinion from the grapevine is that he doesnt bother anyone but he,s fully engrossed and fascinated by the art of making money,earning him the nickname "Jack of all trades,father of dollars".

More to come,its time for the evening men,s prayers.Taaa! See you soon.

THE RESTLESS VICAR: ANGRY BUT PLEASED! AND SO WHAT!

THE RESTLESS VICAR: ANGRY BUT PLEASED! AND SO WHAT!: "You all know who a vicar is, head of a vicarage.That,s what I am. You see in this business of God one has to be always polite, cheerful and..."

ANGRY BUT PLEASED! AND SO WHAT!

You all know who a vicar is, head of a vicarage.That,s what I am.
You see in  this business of God one has to be always polite, cheerful and happy when sad,Even when you have to smack someone across the head,You cant!For christ sake you are a vicar.
I have to start by telling my position in the diocese, I am the youngest or maybe not,with more feminine attributes.Most people would not dare to speak their minds to the almighty synod.I was getting sick of all the hypocrisy so I spoke up!
The group of old worn out men in our local parochial church committee,were not helping matters.
Oh I felt like screaming,but remember I cant, Vicars are suppose to hear from God,and behave like the Lord himself,so that was what I did,I threw the money changers out of the church,I blew my tops!
Let me describe the nature of the members of the parochial church committee.Believe me, this are my own views and observations,I might be wrong,I am human and I wear a pair of glasses.
Mr Sylavus- One can almost match his name with his attributes, sly,lazy and very porous,cant really stand when a local buys a new watch or shoes,quick to judge,complains at every opportunity,and I dont really thinks he has the mind of his own.I have heard people say he has the mind of his wife,s cookings.
Mr warship- Just join the church few years ago, I heard that he got shot during the burma war,and that affected his reasoning faculty.A slippery character ,never flies striaght and is excessively nervous.
Mr Burustin- I heard that our parish would be the 30th ,he had joined,the story goes that he never stays if he is not appointed treasurer or a committee member.A self rigtheous man that thinks gossip is less a sin compared to smoking.

Hold on guys, You dont expect me to You all their names at once!
Watch and pray! See you guys soon.